Leggo my Ego!
You cannot walk through a bookstore without tripping over books promising to spiritually awakening you. Many of these books preach the evils of having an ego. There has been a big backlash against ego. Daresay even Oprah Winfrey got on the bandwagon espousing Tolle’s philosophies in a multi-episode course.
My point of view is a bit contrarian. I believe that leaders need an ego; people do not follow those without one. Your ego provides you with an opinion, perspective, tenacity, and a concrete vision of the future; a future that you are shaping for the better. You have an ideal vision of your company’s future and your ego is a strong contributor to its achievement.
This being said, both extremes are off base. Too much ego can lead to self-righteousness and can get you into trouble. If you are overly stuck in your opinions, you may not be listening to your customers, staff, or community. An over-stroked ego may alienate you from people you need to help you achieve your goals.
So what’s a person to be?
At institute B we preach a concept we call egolessness. Egolessness is having a porous ego: one where you have enough ego to stay true to your convictions and values but is porous enough to allow for feedback and opinions. We live in a world where common sense and being right is a false sense of security. We must open our minds to others’ perspective to truly be influential. Have conviction but remain egoless.
How does one practice egolessness? Spend two days answering every opinion with ‘you are right.’ And figure out how the other person is right. (NOTE: don’t sign any cheques or contracts in these two days, hehe). Really the exercise is one of learned empathy and openness. Activate your ‘listening to understand’ skills. Then make your decisions. This will go a long way to enroll your team in your vision of the future.
Written by: Darrell Kopke, Skool Principal